Shamhain Anti-Gentrification Riots 2017

Anonymous submission to Conflict Minnesota

Hi y’all! Hope you all had an extra spooky/scary/witchy/wild Samhain/Halloween last night. Occupied south Minneapolis sure did! For all 500 or so people who were there last night this will be kinda dull and mild retelling of what went down last night.

It all began as the sun set around 5:18 pm. 500-1000 people gathered in south Minneapolis to celebrate the end of a season and the coming of a new darker one. As people gathered in Powderhorn Park, cops immediately attacked the super spooky crowd, but because of everyone feeling super empowered in their Halloween costumes the crowd repelled the attack and lit up a couple cop cars in short order. Families and friends were seen dancing around the burning cop car hand in hand laughing and gigglling.

Following that celebration the crowd now numbering at least 10,000-50,000 decided spontaneously and without leadership to go after all of the naughty gentrifying businesses in that neighborhood. Paint was hurled using simple garden pump spray tanks filled with house paint, water and paint thinner, which can be easily procured from local hardware stores free of cost. In total 4 yuppie coffee shop windows and several bus stop adverts for real estate brokers were filled with beautiful Halloween paint.

A comrade in the crowd wearing a super cute Demogorgon Stranger Things costume was quoted as saying “everyone should attack gentrifying businesses in occupied south Minneapolis it’s fun easy and good for the community.” 😍